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Marriage Blessings

Soon, you will begin a covenant family together under the Lordship of Christ.  As the Westminster Confession states in 14-2, may you yield in obedience to Christ’s commands, tremble at the threatenings in His word, and embrace the promises of God for this life and the future.  May you remember that you are both created male and female, and, as the Trinity is perfectly complementary, so is your union to be.  Sin and self worship are the same.  In contrast, marriage is about “self forgetting”.  This is possible by remembering that a union between a man and a woman requires sustained dependence on God through faith in Jesus Christ.  As Christ gave himself up for His bride, the Church, may the husband do the same for his precious bride.  May the groom, see his role as a servant of God and avoid the rebellious sin of bossiness and abandonment and live with his wife with understanding and gentleness.  May he value, cherish, protect, and help her.  A husband’s calling is to be an effective leader in the home while educating the family about biblical principles.  Likewise, as 1 Peter 3:1 shows, we pray the bride will respect her husband by being an encouragement to him while showing obedience to Christ in all meekness with a gentle and quiet spirit.  May the bride show outwardly her yielding to her husband for others to see. (Ephesians 5:22)  May she choose to be cheerful and consistent while forgetting about herself and submitting to Christ as Mary demonstrated with her active passivity at the announcement of Christ’s coming.  May you both remember that marriage is about dying to selfish desires, “ not my will, but yours be done”. (Luke 22:42)  May you both know that marriage is not about what the other can do for you.  Marriage, by design, is a journey in humility that will cause you to depend on the Spirit and look to Christ for guidance. (Romans 8:2, Colossians 3:1)  We pray that you both will be grounded in your faith through Christ and avoid the temptation of living on your own strength.  May God protect you from harsh words toward each other when things go wrong. (James 3:6) Marriage is joyful work and in the kingdom of God about the renewal of relationships. Wishing you the blessing of being enthusiastically married and “co-workers of Christ” as you unite in love as Priscilla and Aquila did centuries ago.

“The churches of Asia send greetings to you. Aquila and Prisca greet you warmly in the Lord, with the church that meets in their house.” (1 Corinthians 16:19, Romans 16:3)

Westminster Confession 14-2
“By this faith a Christian believeth to be true whatsoever is revealed in the Word, for the authority of God himself speaking therein;a and acteth differently upon that which each particular passage thereof containeth; yielding obedience to the commands,b trembling at the threatenings,c and embracing the promises of God for this life and that which is to come.d But the principal acts of saving faith are accepting, receiving, and resting upon Christ alone for justification, sanctification, and eternal life, by virtue of the covenant of grace.”
a. John 4:42; Acts 24:14; 1 Thes 2:13; 1 John 5:10. • b. Rom 16:26. • c. Isa 66:2. • d. 1 Tim 4:8; Heb 11:13. • e. John 1:12; Acts 15:11; 16:31; Gal 2:20.

This morning our garden was filled with hummingbirds, sparrows, yellow warblers, gnat catchers, finches, busy bees, and monarch butterflies.  This wasn’t always true of our yard.  Since planting our sustainable permaculture organic garden, our garden is bursting with life.  Our black adobe clay soil is now bursting with life rich in microbes, red and brown worms, and other living organisms.  The chickens and their wonderful manure had a lot to do with this along with faithful composting.  Our raised beds are full of flowers of many kinds as vegetables and fruits are producing.  We used to have awful tomato worm infestations when we first started home gardening ten years ago.  Today, the birds come every morning and carefully eat our unwanted insects.  Our yard actually smells earthy and is enjoyable to visit.  We are thankful for the cycles of life that we experience year round in our little growing space.  A little “tender loving care” goes a long way in a back yard garden.

Twenty seven years ago I met a woman who would drastically influence my views about many areas of life.  Last week she passed from death to life and now abides in heaven.   “Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life. He does not come into judgment, but has passed from death to life.” (John 5:24)  She was an excellent writer and a public speaker that excluded the fluffy stuff and got straight to the point of her message.  Here are the 7 wise principles that I learned from this woman who influenced my life for good.

1. First, she taught me about purity in a relationship between a man and a woman.  Her mother taught her not to chase boys and to establish healthy physical and emotional  boundaries.   These are wise ideas that prepared me to meet and marry a quality man.

2.  She comforted me in my insecurity about being single and gave me confidence to believe that if God desired a marriage for me that I would not miss meeting that man.

3.  This woman helped me to be patient in suffering and to trust God. “In acceptance lies peace”. (Amy Carmichael)

4.  The blessings and joys of obedience to God’s word were modeled to me through her many writings and personal life.

5.   Her gracious hospitality and openness about troubling times in her life as well as life’s blessings have given me much encouragement and strength.

6.  Her value for a functioning family life helped me to enjoy and accept my role as a woman and to help my husband be the man of the family.  Her wisdom gave me the foundation for a productive household and staying focused in doing the spectrum of menial duties to the more meaningful ones.

7.  Lastly, this wise older woman taught me the importance of ordering my life according to God’s word by living for Christ and dying to my selfish desires with the Holy Spirit’s help.

In conclusion, I chose not to mention the name of this woman as it is easy to want to make an idol out of someone whom God has gifted.  This person was a sinner like all men and women and is in heaven because of the work of Christ and His grace towards her.

One fact I enjoy teaching my students is that there is an order to everything…from the arrangement of the seeds on a sunflower to how a family functions.  Families are a unit where every family member has a role to fulfill.  It isn’t “mommy does everything”.  While shopping at a local health food store, I met a mom with three energetic athletic boys.  We were talking while waiting in the check out line and I was telling her and her boys that mommy isn’t made to do everything.  She seemed relieved and surprised at my response and I told her that families are more like a team of players.  The boys heard and grabbed the grocery bags and took them to the car.  Another mom of four confided that she “felt like she was sinking”.  Being a mom is a lot of work.  My grandmother reminded me that if I wasn’t working hard as a mother, then I probably wasn’t doing a very good job.  As a new-born child matures, they should begin helping with duties around the house.  By the age of two, they are able bring spoons, napkins, and plastic cups to the table.  By three they are able to help with seed sprouting.  Duties should be enjoyable as children see themselves as a team player.  By three and four they should be cleaning up their toys.  This duty can be made easier if one toy is played with at a time and put away before another is permitted to be brought out.  By five and six they can begin making their beds, carrying small unbreakable items from the car, water plants with a small watering can, pull weeds that aren’t too big, and empty the trash.  In the next few years, they can learn to vacuum and dust and do the dishes.  I consider all this as part of their education.  It is learning to bear their own burdens and not learning to be a burden on others…especially mom.  Often it seems easier for the mom to do these chores instead of teaching their kids to do them (and mom ends up exhausted).  It takes time to teach our children, but it is worth it once they master a particular skill.  Since families live under the same roof, they should learn to work cooperatively by sharing the responsibilities around the house.  Everyone will be happier in the end.

“The homemaker has the ultimate career. All other careers exist for one purpose only – and that is to support the ultimate career. ” — C.S. Lewis

Local control is best for transparency.  Clear communication is best to help retain liberty and peace.  This week a freshman Congresswoman, Mimi Walters, disclosed that she is for the Trans-Pacific Partnership (TPP) even though she hasn’t read the pages inside the trade deal.  This is analogous to signing mortgage papers without knowing what you have signed up for.  What is worse is that representatives like Walters affect the lives of millions of people based on their decisions.  Wouldn’t it be wise for her to read what is inside before she votes?  Does she have any concern for her constituents?  The problem is that it is not only Representative Walters who wants to vote without reading the contents.  There are a host of other representatives as well.  Additionally, the American people and other countries have no idea how this partnership will influence their ability to conduct business and acquire goods.  Could this partnership be a power grab for major corporations?  This partnership will affect not only Americans, but 11 other countries (Australia, Brunei, Canada, Chile, Japan, Malaysia, Mexico, New Zealand, Peru, Singapore, and Vietnam).  Will international laws overrule the national laws of these nations?  People should be very concerned about this agreement because it sounds huge.  What about the laws in countries that prohibit genetically engineered foods?  How will this affect the farmers and biodiversity?  Further, I am wondering why are we in such a hurry to pass a partnership like this which could have many ramifications on millions (billions?) of people.   Big decisions take time to make and there should not be a rush to pass a plan without getting wise advice from reputable council.  We need wise leadership that cares about people.  Not blind ones who act like fools.

“White Privilege”, “Brown Power”, “Black Lives Matter”….all human lives matter from the unborn to the frail elderly.  If we could all just love our neighbors as ourselves all of the world’s problems would be solved.*  Government meddling in affairs it doesn’t belong does not solve problems, it makes them worse.  Recently, the news has disclosed that an organization from San Francisco named Pacific Educational Group has been hired to consult with schools in St. Paul, Minnesota.  This program creates different standards of behavioral expectations for students based on their race.  A  particular group of students gets to attend school while expressing anarchy without consequences.  This creates an environment of chaos.  Instead of training students for their future “real life” situations, they are being set up for future failure.  Anarchy is not how society functions.  Order brings peace and productivity.  For decades the government has interfered with racial matters.  Programs like Affirmative Action disadvantaged citizens.  The only place the government has a right to intervene is when an injustice has occurred when a citizen is deprived of their Constitutional rights.  Like the Declaration of Independence states, “we hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal”.  All people should be treated justly.  Discrimination against a person because of their skin color is wrong in every area of life.

*”And this is love, that we walk according to his commandments;” (2 John 6)  “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

God made all of us in his own image so that we would reflect his character and moral beauty.

Every Human Should Live for God’s Glory by John Piper
“Whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God” (1 Corinthians 10:31). The way to live for the glory of God is to love him (Matthew 22:37), trust him (Romans 4:20), be thankful to him (Psalm 50:3) and obey him (Matthew 5:16). When we do these things we image-forth God’s glory.

We Have All Sinned and Fallen Short of God’s Glory
“All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23). “Although they knew God they did not glorify him as God or give thanks to him…but exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images…” (Romans 1:21-23). None of us has loved or trusted or thanked or obeyed God as we ought.

We All Deserve Eternal Punishment
“The wages of sin is (eternal) death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Jesus Christ our Lord” (Romans 6:23). Those who did not obey the Lord Jesus “Shall suffer the punishment of eternal destruction and exclusion from the presence of the Lord and from the glory of his might” (2 Thessalonians 1:9). “They shall go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life” (Matthew 25:46).

In His Great Mercy God Sent Forth His Only Son Jesus Christ to Provide for Sinners the Way of Eternal Life
“For God so loved the world that he gave his only son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16). “Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law, having become a curse for us” (Galatians 3:13). “Christ also died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might bring us to God” (1 Peter 3:18).

Eternal Life Is a Free Gift to All Who Will Trust in Christ as Lord and Savior
“Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved” (Acts 16:31). “If you confess with your lips that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved” (Romans 10:9). “By grace are you saved through faith; and this is not your own doing, it is the gift of God—not of works, lest any man should boast” (Ephesians 2:8). “I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me; and the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me” (Galatians 2:20).

Roughly 4,000 schools in the United States are located within 1,000 feet of pesticide sprayed crops like corn and soy.  It is estimated that 90% of the chemicals used may drift away from the area being sprayed.  Clouds of chemicals could be filling the classrooms of our nation’s youth in these agricultural areas.  The long-term effects could be devastating as these young bodies grow and develop.  I wonder if there has been actual testing done to examine what levels of farm toxins are lurking on these campuses.  Someone close to me lived in a farming area while pregnant.  After giving birth, it was discovered that her child had a mild birth defect.  Her doctor suggested that it may have happened because of pesticide drift from the local farms.  This defect could be corrected with surgery and was, but gives moms something to think about when living in these chemical laden farming zones.  Like smoking has “tobacco free zones” why can’t we live in “pesticide free zones”?  The spray not only impacts the farms, but the air, water, and soil in the surrounding areas. The rivers in these areas could be full of poisonous runoff from all this spraying.   No wonder our bees and butterflies are disappearing!  A decade ago we used Roundup on our garden since the young man at the hardware store assured us that it biodegraded in two days.  We discovered that this rumor was not true and took our chemical to our local hazardous waste center for disposal.  Since then, we are completely pesticide free.  Birds, bees, and butterflies love visiting our garden.  It is a “safe” zone for them and for us.    In 2014 spending on cancer medications was at an all time high of 100 billion dollars.  Some studies estimate that 1:2 males will get cancer and 1:3 females will get cancer.  People shouldn’t have to tolerate being sprayed with unwanted chemicals in their area.  Click on the link below to see how much pesticide is being sprayed in your area.

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The Constitution of the United States established in 1789, is a document that gives the greatest amount of human freedom to individuals while playing down government interference to that freedom.  All Americans are guaranteed a right to self-government.  Your freedoms are not to be transferred to others.  Today, the powers of the Constitution are being usurped by various citizens that either have forgotten the laws that protect freedom, or they ignore them.  Every person has a right to bodily integrity.  Laws that diminish or take away the right to informed consent are unconstitutional.  Doctors and legislatures across this country are seeking to remove individual freedoms from making health choices regarding medications that are injected into our bodies.  Today, states are seeking to remove most of the ability to have a medical exemption, a philosophical exemption, and even a religious exemption when seeking an informed decision about whether or not to allow a medication to be administered into children and adults.  Doctors and manufacturers are legally protected if harm is done to any of their patients.  Families of injured patients from using medications are liable for the lifetime care of their loved ones.  While caring for our grandmother with dementia, she required 4 hospitalizations, 2 rehabilitations for broken hips, and medical care for a hand infection.  She was pretty sick for all these events, but the doctors and nurses were faithful to their call and always asked if she wanted her flu shot, pneumococcal shot, and dTap booster shot.  Prior to her decline she made sure to tell us that she had a bad reaction to a flu shot and didn’t want any more of those or further vaccinations.  Certain people like to take extremes.  Laws mandating vaccines for all is an extreme.  The founders of this country had each person in mind–not the masses.  Every person is different genetically, environmentally, in age, and in health.   The government is seeking to take parental choice away from families regarding vaccines.  This is not protecting constitutional freedoms that were intended by our founders.  An example of putting all people in the same box is the public school system.  Even though children learn differently because of their individuality they are all put into the same box of public schooling.  The result has been a disaster.  Likewise, mandating vaccines for all children who desire certain government services is lumping all individuals into the same box.  The government is not considering people’s individuality and wants to group everyone together as if we were clones of each other.  We are not clones, but each one uniquely special.  Doctors and nurses have not received a broad range of unbiased information while being schooled about vaccines.  Stories of vaccine coercion and intimidation from doctors are being told.  If people are not comfortable with a medical procedure they should have the freedom to say no.  If a doctor or nurse is coercing people to get shots they don’t want, then ask them to sign a written guarantee that you are 100% free from any harm being done.  The choice/freedom to receive a medication (vaccine) should be yours and yours alone after informed consent.

Earlier this year, we offered to help a young man who was one day away from being homeless.  He was a smooth talker and persuaded us that he was intent on making money and being employed.  This person has the talent to succeed, but seems unwilling to start at the bottom and work his way up.  Instead, he continued with talk and promised multiple times that he would produce some income.  After hours of  talking, tears of sorrow, the man’s life never changed and nothing was produced.  He used his time to figure out how not to work instead of discovering the value of work.  “In all toil there is profit, but mere talk tends only to poverty.”(Proverbs 14:23)  He chose to be idle instead of producing something of value because he did not want to work in a lower position that would lead him to one with more responsibility.  The people who work hard, persevere, and use their creativity are the successful ones that surround me.  This experience has taught me a lesson about the dangers of entitlement.  While this person lived with us, he was content to use our belongings as his, eat our food, and drink our bottled water.  He was quite at ease.  People who are able should not be a burden to others.  In a letter to the Thessalonians, Paul the apostle wrote that “we were not idle when we were with you,  nor did we eat anyone’s bread without paying for it, but with toil and labor we worked night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you.”  The Baltimore tragedy weighs heavy on my heart.  It is hard for me to imagine a place that has 30 percent unemployment where people stand around in the streets because they have nothing to do.  Throwing money at the situation did not solve the problems of Sandtown in Baltimore since they received 130 million in aid from the state and federal government a few decades ago.  Entitlements make people dependent and then they lose their ability to be creative and solve problems.  We all have a responsibility to help the poor, but not to enable them.  It would be nice if these people could start a garden planting trees, fruits, vegetables, and herbs.  This would give them something soul satisfying to do and help them to learn useful skills.  They could learn to cook using the produce off the land.  From the garden they might go to the classroom to volunteer; showing their produce and how they prepare it for use.  These people might go to a church and ask if there is any one in need that they might help.  Pulling an elderly person’s weeds is a start.   Perhaps there is a business where a person can be an apprentice and learn a skill.  Contentment and happiness begins with productivity that comes from ownership from work that has been generated by one’s own labors.